Showing posts with label northern planner. Show all posts
Showing posts with label northern planner. Show all posts

Monday 23 November 2020

Sleaford Mods - Mork n Mindy Ft Billy Nomates



Mork 'n' Mindy, Action Man 'n' Cindy
I don't mess about
I make 'em kiss each other when my mum 'n' dad go out
No messing, no curtain twitching, no stressing
I don't hang about, I get 'em down and dirty
Then get 'em falling out, then get 'em flirty
Get 'em throwing plates at each other
'Cause that's what's it's all about
Oi, fuck off back to your own room, welcome
In the back room, when fuck all's going on, what's new?
And the plated scenes of that
I live on a really depressing cul de sac
Where couples get divorced
And people come up that you'd never seen before
Like that smell of cigars and oil twat
You go, too high, too low
It doesn't make a difference
I know, too high, too low
But the system won't go
Too high, too low
It doesn't make a difference
I know, too high, too low
But the system won't go
Mork 'n' Mindy, I got eagle eyes above me
I just hit it out, in beige and tan and stain proof kitchen mats
And out, house, pheasant just hanging about
Look at the seed pouch on the fucker, old man and his brother
Setting about, stinks like an old body, like mornings on the voddy
Shotgun lager hotty, like PornHub, sticking constantly
WiFi's gone all lo-fi, my arse is feeling too dry
Like crackers out at midnight, I can't be arsed with butter alright
You're not from round here, crashed landed about a week ago
Yeah, I feel for you, I do
The state of it is alarming, so don't presume anything
Or Blue Monday will someday become you
Well the furniture's the same, but the menu's rearranged
And your jokes won't land in the same space you're used to
You go, too high, too low
It doesn't make a difference
I know, too high, too low
But the system won't go
Too high, too low
It doesn't make a difference
I know, too high, too low
But the system won't go
I looked out on the throw outside of my window
Outside there wasn't anything nice to see
I wanted things to smell, like meadows not like hell
Dying dandelions and bumble bees
I looked out at the throw outside of my window
Outside there wasn't anything nice to see
I wanted things to smell, like meadows not like hell
Dying dandelions and bumble bees
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Andrew Robert Fearn / Jason Williamson / Victoria Maries
Mork n Mindy lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc

Description

Released2020

They're described as an Indie band, but in my mind they're space rappers. 

This is one sweet fucking track.

Sunday 27 April 2008

Crouching Tiger Hidden Bacon

Bread in Asian shopping malls has an interesting positioning that is more like a dessert or indulgent snack. There are sandwich outlets but these mostly cater for Westerners or in some cases Asians who have lived or were educated abroad (a growing and highly influential population).

Easily the tastiest and best named bread snack in the world ever is the "Crouching Tiger Hidden Bacon" from Bread Talk here in Beijing. It costs 9 RMB (10 RMB to 1 Euro) and is most awesome.


I often like to buy one and drink one of their Yorkshire Tea lattes because even Northern Planner would crumble for a Yorkshire Tea latte if he hadn't had a single cuppa in months and months. Incidentally if any of you ever get round to reading Jeffrey Steingartens amazing book 'The man who ate everything' (and every planner should) you will discover that all taste is learned.

Tuesday 4 September 2007

Sunny

While watching the world cup last year in a tropical bar, before setting off to India, I got into a conversation with a creative who made a very acute observation about England's performance.

She informed me that the English could never really hope to win as we struggled to beat Costa Rica. A side from a country where the national squad makes 150 dollars a month and the population is under five million.

Psychologically we Brits are fond of rooting for the underdog. I thought this was a good insight for our complete lack of killer instinct against a side who were otherwise better known for playing the pan pipes after a hot and sweaty game in a Latin American climate as I wrote about here.

Anyway I've watched these online votes go peaches up before. First John Grant cast the winning vote for the pedestrian Um Bongo, against the infinitely hipper Kia-Ora over at Beeker's. Then Bacon lost out to Sausage, when we all know that Bacon is proof that God exists. So here is a chance to redeem ourselves.

The Kaiser over in Munich (who started the iPod singing craze here, here and here without anybody asking him some months back) has taken on The Northern Planner asserting that The Smiths are rubbish. His first pick for German opposition was Kraftwerk but The Northern Blouse crumbled at this suggestion and so sportingly Marcus (crazy like a fool) Brown (The Kaiser) has plumped for Boney M. The loser has to sing a song from the opponents music on Youtube and post to their blog. I've never seen NP sing, let alone do "Brown girl in the ring". So please hold that visual in your mind while I make this request.

I think we all know deep down who is the underdog here. I ask for nothing less than your votes for Marcus while leaving you with the awesome string arrangement on Sunny.